Accidents

He smokes and has all kinds of smoking related accidents. He accidentally burned his jeep down -- I'm not joking. The fire department filled the jeep with a foot of water, and the good news was it was still drivable after the fire. Just a bit melted in some places. He burns his fingers on the tips of cigarettes, he lights them on the wrong end -- one time we were sharing a cigar and he took it and put the lit end in his mouth. He realized that mistake at the very last microsecond and spit the cigar and ashes violently into the air. The still lit cigar landed on my hand. So my pal says, "What can I do? I'm constantly burning things, my clothes, me, you." I said, "Quit smoking." He said, "I don't think I can." So I said, "Then smoke more for the practice." Last week I heard he decided to quit smoking after he accidentally lit his bed on fire. But then later I heard he changed his mind.

QUOTATIONS FROM FAMOUS PEOPLE THROUGHOUT HISTORY COMPLAINING ABOUT THINGS FROM TIME TO TIME

"Fuck! Fuck!!!"

Ernest Hemingway


"These shoes are awful. I just can't relax."

Louis Armstrong


"What the Hell?!?! Now what am I supposed to do?"

Babe Ruth


"I'm sick of this wallpaper."

F. Scott Fitzgerald


"A Japanese party. There wasn't a damn stick of furniture to even sit on."

Pablo Picasso


"I did the whole damn ceiling. Leo was a prick."

Leonardo da Vinci

SOME RANDOM FAMOUS QUOTES SHORTENED TO MAKE THEM MORE RECOVERABLE FOR THAT SPECIAL OCCASION

"Four score and seven years ago..."

A. Lincoln
Gettysburg Address

"Friends..."

G. Washington
Washington's Farewell Address

"Friends..."

Wm. Shakespeare
M. Anthony, in Julius Caesar

"My only regret..."

N. Hale
Last Words

"To be..."

Wm. Shakespeare
Hamlet, in Hamlet

Ibid - Gone

"Now, I am going to say something...there I have said something."

(An Abbreviated Quote from Chung Tzu)

-----

00.8 Before waking up, he heard her voice, quite clearly from 1975.
01.0 He sees birds in everything, glittering machinebirds twittering.
02.0 The wireless router is not plugged in.
03.0 He is actually an Indian, in a computer simulation. The computer simulation aims to recreate what Manhattan Island would look and feel like in 1609.
04.0 He has about 35 cents of Earth, Wind, and Fire.
05.0 He has a blue pen. There is a jet over there.
06.1 The jet is over there, now.
07.7 Ibid.
07.9 Gone.


----

Oak Park
N. Lombard Street

Poem - he laughs

he laughs
can't remember what he dreamed

while dreaming
can't remember this life, either

Poem - you can't hurt me

i face your anger
you can't hurt me
i'm here hurting myself

Poem - like a soldier on patrol

briskly we rise each day
and seldom do you see yourself
rarely do you realize you go about
your day like a soldier on patrol

Or as an Exquisite Violin

I dreamed there are no real things. Looking at a thing, you realize it is actually not one whole thing, but a collection of smaller appearing things. A collection of aggregates. Looking at the smaller things, each one, you will see in every case, any smaller things is a collection of things. In investigating, you will never arrive at any one thing. You will only find more aggregates. Ego decides you have a foot, this wall is solid, and we had lunch together yesterday. But if you really try to find foot, wall, or lunch yesterday, they are not there. Your mind says they are locatable, and this is nonsense, but they still are not there.

----

I dreamed, I heard a voice, quite clearly. It said a few things.

"There are some questions that have no answers."

"There are some answers that have no questions."

The voice repeated these lines a few times, without the slightest bit of concern, nor irony, sounding a bit like clear running water, or as an exquisite violin.

both will try to trick you

let us sum up:

they are coming for you, and you can't get away.

the universe gives us what we want. just ask, and you get whatever you want.

the schedule is fixed. this is your own recruitment. you chose your own version of the morality play.

abide, or be confused. be mad at the swing-set. be satisfied, or say you were born unlucky. you can sit, or go forth.

hear the voice of god, play with the devil. both will try to trick you.

Chung Tzu and Falling Branch

Chung Tzu goes out of the apartment, and later comes back.

"I'd like you to meet a friend of mine." says Chung Tzu. "Here he is -- meet Falling Branch."

"Hello, Falling Branch." I say, and we shake hands. I notice he has on a nice brown sports coat, probably from the GAP.

"Nice to meet you." says Falling Branch.

"I wanted to ask you a question, if I may."

"Go ahead and ask."

"If a branch falls in the forest, and nobody is around, does it make a sound?"

"Only if I'm having a good time." says Falling Branch.

Chung Tzu & a Perfect Day

Suddenly, Chung Tzu comes in.

"Hello brother!" he exclaims. "What a perfect day! You look like you're at your wits' end! You remind me of a wasp who thinks it can't sting!"

I do the dishes. I wash the floors. I clean the bathroom, take out the recycling, the trash, and other junk.

"Feeling better?" asks Chung Tzu, after I am done with my work.

"Not really." I admit.

"HAH!" laughs Chung Tzu. "Don't worry -- this is the way things work: something or another thing will come along and change your mind!"

Poem - be everywhere

me in everything
you in everything

there's no getting out
but why do you try?

the way to go
is to go

travel lightly
with a smile

see heaven and earth
above and below

be everywhere

Poem - happy/ by a tree in the yard

where are the people i love
where are my thunderstorms
where is the mail
where is my nerf machinegun
where are those dreams last night
where are my eyeglasses
where are my snacks
cigarettes
paper
pens

i can only see the open window
by a phone
near some stamps

& a little kid playing alone
happy with an empty
box
by a tree in the yard

Poem - living here at the same time

hot & humid
hard to think
but it is cooling down

june said
if we were on vacation
we'd think this heat
would be exotic

now i'm focusing
on being on vacation
living here at the same time

Poem - hello/ i miss you

hello
i miss you

it might rain today

oak park
august

Poem - i'll go to hell

-- Dear Reader: This is a shitty poem -- but for some reason I'm keeping it.

--------------

if i broke your heart
i was meant to*

if your heart was not touched
then it is a stone**

i'll go to hell for the pain
i've caused***

no illusions about this i know
i'm going to hell****

--------------

* Written without bravado.

** A famous French philosopher termed it, "In this life, if your heart does not break, then it certainly must be turned into lead."

*** Karma. Debate the point all you want, if you do, it is your karma.

**** Hell is now.

Poem - even try to imagine

could be a journey home
not just for the lack of sleep or hangover


driving driving the land rolls out
rivers towns silos railroads flash by
the land rises up into blue mountains
meanwhile i sit here on my ass
and presume to even try to imagine
what it is like

Poem - i imagine you quite clearly

specks of water
then rain rain rain

love

i imagine you quite clearly
as it rains

Poem - let's have pizza

let's have pizza
and then make out

i'll notice you
taste like pepperoni

mmmmmmm
what part do i taste like?