i called the time of my father’s death
now i remember it every april 22nd
the moment is in the morning
looking clear but it also might rain
there’s a strong breeze flying clouds
.
i’m the clock with a brain and eyes
noting how his last breaths go in and out
his pursed lips as if he were taking air
under water through a reed
each breath a little less and a little less
to the point where i had to lean over
and listen & listen all receding into silence
then nothing how could he be so still
.
later we had a wake and cut slices of cake
there were sunflowers
he loved sunflowers
i never knew
there was much about him
i never knew
.
we flow from moment to moment
in this life like we are fixed here
or as if riding on a gentle stream
but the current is deep
and it ends in oblivion
but enough of that
enjoy the scenery with me today
look at the banks of the river
the sky and all the things we can see
choose to enjoy it despite the fact
it ends in so many ways
though exalted and amazed
in what you receive
everything granted
is also being taken back
tut tut let go let go
breath
breath
breath
....
...
..
.
.
.
love this
and you will
find freedom
----
for my Father
