you admire in yourself
how so many love you
making you feel secretly proud
i just one of the chorus
you let me be devoted
for you to feel exalted

given over
to this temporary power
higher than death on it
more glad than the sun or stars
brighter and more alluring
than the moon

you grew tired of me
of my hands of my words
of my face of my body
longing increased
anger and fear too
then only yourself to you

but when it is dark
i am the one you left behind
i am the one you aren't thinking of
you can go with as many lovers
i'll still be on your mind
i am the one you left behind

so speaks the withering ego
relentless like a wound mechanism
like a wounded abomination

to be free of such sentiments
freedom itself without any limits
wide as the sky without any ending

even pat-a-cake and kisses
have the essence of redemption
not even separate from other forms


**