your thoughts like dogs getting into a kitchen

your thoughts like dogs getting into a kitchen
rooting & getting at all the food on the counters
ruining the meal for everyone who waited
even you and all the bounty you gathered
into yourself you trampled and slobbered over

the untrained thoughts we run with
mind slipping past and all the mischief
this exuberant savagery revels to create
rebellious purposes and justified revenge
later causing weeping and isolation

turn from the braying of the world
braggarts would have you be like a dog
flinging treasure onto the ground
despoiling your own self
as you try to outrun death



****

i won't confuse you by talking in code / but i am trying to elude my own committee

i won't confuse you by talking in code
but i am trying to elude my own committee
my own rectifiers certifiers and checkers
that perform search and destroy missions
to eradicate communication and personalities
from the purity and whimsy of the subconscious

we all born with this galactic channel of bliss
beating behind the beating of our heart
the color of the color behind the eyes
insistent and spontaneous full of surprises
full of challenge and revealing play and kindness
lifting us out of the tyranny of ego and will

yet expunged expunged denied expunged
explained blunted broken burned
electro shocked removed crafted curtained

through this we discovered
and those who would cure us
it cannot be shut nor turned

if it is universal and true
the seat of every expression

in the center of all directions
it cannot be trained nor tinned


^^^

go to the highest height / eat sliver and gold

go to the highest height
eat sliver and gold
is your culture holding you down
take geophysical readings
find the context by extending

on an early day
unwrap you eyes from cotton
unhinge your eyes from snow
go to the magic cafe
lay the marble tea
find context from the poets

your culture lied to you
about silver and gold
about what is higher and lower

you are under the earth
your eyes are buried
in stratification and a feature

find an early day
full of golden light inviting
escape your own will

escape silver and gold
break out from the cafe
say fuck off to your culture

make the oaths accountable
only to who matters you

wisdom the day out heart
and mind out of forges

endlessly higher

meet the stars



**

true mania cannot see proofs for its own self

true mania cannot see proofs for its own self
i am the maniac who thinks they are even-keeled
i swear i am largely unoffensive and mild
but i crackle with energy and am always disruptive
offended toward what i think is boring or superfluous
which actually are just examples of consideration
towards others and how they deserve to be treated
with compassion gentleness and dignity




***

sunday afternoon before 3 / a few flakes of snow fall

sunday afternoon before 3
a few flakes of snow fall

the cat sleeps curled up
i read other people's poetry

it is a forgetting of self
a release like looking at snow flakes

reading another poet
now again hearing people

in the apartment above
creaking creaking walking shuffling

bumping banging shifting creaking
thumping walking

putting on a cd of music
sounds above move to the background

in all this there is a mantra
that is very specific for what i notice

...  whatever sounds are heard
...  be they pleasant or annoying

...  hear them as sounds of emptiness
...  remain in that state without judgment

i am connected so intimately
with every sense and creature perceived

every person i am with in poems
snow cats music and walkers above

**

realm of desire / land of no fear

realm of desire
land of no fear
put something before me

another house
another face
another form

so i may burn it to ashes
with the fire in my eyes
furnace of my brain



****

put something before me / another face

put something before me
another face
so i may burn it to ashes
with the fire in my eyes and the
furnace of my brain

isn't this the way we go
to destruction ourselves
turned from breathing
warm flesh with feelings
to nothing at all

in the crucible of
electronic exchanges
humanity now
string of numbers
sterile signals

back into patterns
meaningless stacked
endlessly
atoms emptiness
void

none of us were disposable
none of us were forgettable
none of us were cliche
or useless
or undesirable



***

this day for today

this day for today
has no set form we can have it
any way we want it to be

you could say it started
with a tear or a hurrah
and kept going that way

let us be vigilant then
true awake bright and here
today a persistent perfection

if you have bad cares
let the day convince you
it should be otherwise

do it through yourself
with a kind thought or smile
for you and someone else

winnowing out all errant
untamed and random wild
we become more reasonable

even to ourselves
even to the sky even to you
even to what is wild


***

let go to hold on

let go to hold on
hold on by seeing

there is very little
that must be done

what must be done
is already in doing



**

what a blessing to feel there are blessings to be had

what a blessing to feel there are blessings to be had
for having courage to even make peace with doubts
then nothing needs to be altered or be different
may it change or be the same however it may be
because you and i are the gatekeeper and we are the gate
we see a desert space bereft of all hope or a holy field farflung
indeed became full when we allowed ourselves to be included


***

on monday morning it is snowing which means

on monday morning it is snowing which means
everything is perfect and nothing needs to be changed
traffic will go slower but who cares when we can watch
a new world be created that turns into a fairyland over all
which was rough or dirty or too familiar now becomes palaces
for the eye to admire all the twigs decorated with ice crystals
offerings extending into infinity the wonder it can be


***

we take few risks rarely budge for our small orbits

we take few risks rarely budge for our small orbits
social media and text have made us shadows to each other
you or i could be anything like silhouettes cast on the wall
the work of inventive hands -- as a dove as a wolf as angel or savior
or just telling tales and fancies with symbols and charms
that eventually are false because there is no substitute
for the presence of another who might honestly meet us halfway

alas the heart shrivels
in the vacuum of this space

i am the electronic ozymandias
look upon my works and feel nothing


**

god take me there and keep me there if you can all the days of my life

i don't understand anything do you?
i can merely report what i seem to be seeing and what i choose
the freeway is flowing along smoothly this late afternoon
the customary speed when dusk is coming
adjacent field has the last bit of sunshine flung out
all the reeds above a snowy ice covered pocket lake
with a charming wall of clouds in the background
even a few birds in the sky like thoughts in my mind
blissfully unconnected with details on this slice of awarenss
to stay just in seeing without any thoughts connected
only in awareness of things as they are and not how i'd like them to be
god take me there and keep me there if you can all the days of my life


888

the company and you

the company rips your mind out and stomps on it
you accept this because you've been socialized
to be a good worker and keep your chin up no matter what
if you complain you won't be able to get another job
but there is no reward to being a good worker
the only rewards go to the company run by investors
girted in the armor of algorithms
nor care about anything real in the world

the company gets rid of you with an offer you cannot refuse
you accept this because you're human ballast
but you thought you were something else

you are money houses cars yard pool revenge tie and dining
you are vacation hawaii dancing sessions prep school martyrdom
you are liar oil popping time waster subordinate grinding angry face
you are excuses fucker private prison bitcoin bitch investor wannabe

girted in the armor of what could have been
and what illusions could be
nor care about anything real in the world


---

here are pictures of me 1,000 years ago

here are pictures of me 1,000 years ago
when i was young and we breathed outside
on the place called earth that you say does not exist
or is a fairy tale or fantasy to instruct and warn
the little ones to conserve energy and think twice

in the pictures you'll notice i am not made of chrome fibers
that i had a body of flesh and bone made in a womb
no multidimensional quantum bubbles no scintillating synapses
no ocean we all share of calculation and sensations
yes we were separate from each other

separation that almost doomed us
it perverted all our thinking from wholesome outcomes
we lived in fear because of our bodies and couldn't surrender
when earth was almost destroyed we were removed
here are pictures of me 1,000 years ago




***

towards end of day / i can see

towards end of day
i can see
a shaft of sunlight
across the field
illuminates
the tops of reeds
and a light pole
straight and bright

farther back
in the landscape
rows of cars drive
towards
the edge of light
like the pole
signifies a barrier

past is death

but they drive on to it
cars drive past it
they don't know
don't know
live or dead
they don't know

-----

Minnetonka
1.16.18

let it keep snowing / and i'll play jazz records

let it keep snowing
and i'll play jazz records

tree branches will wave
in stray gusts of wind

the cat will be fascinated
with racing squirrels getting food

may it snow intricately
fulsomely ensorcelly continuously

let it keep snowing

and i'll play jazz records


_____


Osseo

more beautiful snow this bright morning / this time the flakes are bodhicitta

more beautiful snow this bright morning
this time the flakes are bodhicitta

zig-zagging back and forth loving absolutely without limit
everything above in the sky and below on this earth

i naturally think of you being loved by the snow
on this white still bright day


----

Osseo
Eagle Lake

true dharma makes us / want to shout

refusal
to challenges

brings
same results

arrogance
boredom

tedium
restlessness

true
dharma

makes us
want to shout

and
annihilate

our
illusions



**

you believe you live in a fortress / with a commanding view of all the world

you believe you live in a fortress
with a commanding view of all the world
and everyone in it

you think you are secure
with all the means and freedoms to succeed
through your will

but you live in a prison
that you made yourself and there is no vista
you can see no one

from time to time
you notice how small your cell is becoming
and go deeper into dreams

you suffer but you think
someone else is responsible
for a granting of parole

what a pitiful state
to be a prisoner in your own mind
and not surrender

all are lost in will
all imprisoned ego's slaves
until we let go


**

when it snows i don't think of anyone

when it snows i don't think of anyone
i don't miss someone

i watch the snow fall and the wind blow
free of everything

so content it takes an effort to believe
i'm here in this body

if i do remember you i'm instantly glad
and i don't miss you

you're here for a little bit and then gone
i don't hold onto anything

as long as it is snowing
i am free of my own mind

am and see
no difference



**

fond thoughts go nowhere/ yet i still believe in them

fond thoughts go nowhere
yet i still believe in them
and i still send them

i owe you a great debt
kindness you did for me
a long time ago

so i believe
you'd want me
to keep my heart warm

these words
like pebbles
into a great division

seeming endless
yet can be filed up
someday

in any case
there is no end
we are never separated

above or below
time are just illusions
and we are at play





**

my words
like martlets

merrythoughts
beyond douceur

cantillations
orectic to you



**

do you put on a brave face and pretend it does not ever hurt
i know all the reasons why it makes no sense to be hurt
to not feel let down
how you can't expect anything from anybody

just like watching the outside world
how could we be sad because the field was dappled in shade at noon
or it would thunder on the leaves
when it did storm did we know it so and our heart was crying

making long lists and getting all done
tucking shushing striving and pushing through the days as they rise and fall
befuddled what it means
not admitting this to anyone as a sign of weakness

being innoffensive
being kind to others
being devoted
praying constantly

eventually i am tired of my own thoughts
every single one of them they took me nowhere
so tonight i abandon myself
and i hope to not be so tight in the morning

i'll see the new light and not think of the face i wanted to see
i'll be easy and have no thinking about self or others
anything that happens
will be absolutely pristine


**

free of obnubilation
you are my heart's solander

i will be your spurrier
even a sun gazing stylite

this day as a mistigris
an omphalos

what you thought
was mere bawbee

in life's
anfractuous ways

transforms into
abracadabra amphisbaena


***

branches form a miniature dream cathedral / and the forging squirrels penitent

a new day with nothing wrong with it
like every day that ever was

you or me contemplating by way
of a window frosted round

looking at flecks of the immaculate
strangers to this earth fall and rest

so bright and cold the snow fallen
breaths and shifts with each wind

a new day with nothing wrong with it
you can just see past into a field

branches form a miniature cathedral
and the forging squirrels like penitents


_____

Jan 2
2018

Jan 2

a new day with nothing wrong with it
like every day that ever was

you or me stirring the contents
looking at flecks of the immaculate

proof of some kind of essay
via holy brain forge hammer and anvil

these residual sparks punctuate
highlight the otherwise drab suzerainty



----

Jan 2
2018