Writing - Have a Blessed Korean Day

It was a bit hysterical, getting used to the spell-checker on the new phone. But occasionally you can wish people a 'happy day' or also a 'Korean day', and when you say 'love right back' and it comes out 'love rightly back', doubly true.

And better yet, when he asked his phone, "Will I have a good day?" It didn't say aye, or nay -- instead it directed him to a website that suggested how to have a good day, in 19 steps, with pictures.

Oh wise phone. :  - )


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Poem - Illusion is Yours

I have more flying dreams
-- the dreams are always the same:

I soar walking or skating on air,
amazing how easy it is.

All you have to do is believe,
and that illusion is yours.


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Quail Meadow
2014

The First Dream I Remember of 2014

On New Years day, I wake up before dawn. It is 2014.

I realize I had a dream of my teacher who died in July of 2013.

In the dream, we are at the Dharma center in the Santa Cruz mountains, the place my teacher founded. It is just after dawn, the light a bit misty. We are in a field, and there is a line of people waiting to get a blessing from my teacher.

I'm three back, from the front of the line, and off to the side a bit so I can see my teacher.

The first people in line is a couple I know very well, they have given the last 20 years of their life in the service of this teacher.

It seems they want to give my teacher an offering, some mark of special respect, but they don't have what they want to give to him. When I realize they are non-plussed, I go to them and say, here is something you can give our teacher.

I take off my mala, and I give it to them -- I tell them this mala was the last thing I possess from our teacher, that he blessed with his own hands.

Our teacher puts the mala on, and the couple begs him for a blessing.

Our teacher says "Of course -- I have a good one! A special one!" and with a huge smile on his face -- the biggest radiant smile I've ever seen, he grabs the bottom of the mala and rips it downwards and breaks the mala so all the beads on the top fly through the air.

The whole mala is falling to the ground, I dive to the feet of my teacher to grab the beads before they get irretrievably lost. I grabs some beads and I see ringsal is there too, so I have some beads and ringsal.

Then I vividly see my teacher kneel to the ground over me, seizing my wrist. I look at him, and he is about 35 years old, young and strong and smiling. His grip is very strong.

"What are you doing?" he asks kindly, intently.

"Its okay! I'm gathering the beads so your blessings won't be lost for all of us. I've broken this mala before, and I don't want to lose any more beads."

My teacher smiles, happy to hear what I said. He looks up, still kneeling over me, and says "See, all of you -- what an excellent practitioner this boy is."

When he says this, I begin to cry, because I would rather have my teacher back and well and alive -- than have this dream where my teacher says such shocking things.

Movie review of Michael Mann's "The Keep"

Review of "The Keep", a 1980s horror movie written and directed by Michael Mann, who also directed Miami Vice: "A great movie to watch, while sorting mismatched socks."


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The Italian Monster Truck Racing Association -- Rally at the Vatican, 2014

My son last night attended a monster truck rally in Angel's Stadium in Anaheim, CA. A good time was had by all. Interesting, I found out today that the Italian Monster Truck Racing Association  / Italiana Truck Enorme Fraterna Groupo (ITEFG)), has announced a new monster truck racing series that will be scheduled, tentatively at the Vatican, for later 2014. Scheduled in historic St. Peter's Square, to appear will be the terrifying "La Santa Famiglia" formerly known as "Incitatus", now sponsored exclusively by the Holy See -- thus the new name. Also in the competing, "St. Peter" (formerly known as "Hell Crasher"), "St. Paul" (formerly going by the name "Ravenna Revenge") and a small FIAT monster truck renamed "Lamb of God" will all be appearing for this epic first-ever racing challenge. Details to follow, when they are known.

Writing - Oh, Pamela!

He received an email the other day, from someone he didn't know. From "Pamela Monarrez", the subject was, "Frankly speaking...I WANT YOU!"

Oh, Pamela! Vivid images passed before his eyes -- of palm trees and figs with Pamela with dark eyes, living on sun-kissed beaches, earnestly waiting and lonely. Wearing a bikini and a little cowboy hat.

He clicked on it and followed the links, and he single handedly installed spyware on his computer and all his friends. And he knew what he was doing. He was looking for love in all the wrong places, even with Nigerian scammers.

But what if you did find love that way? Stranger things doubtlessly have happened. He kept clicking away.



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1.11.14

Writing -- Nearly Identical

I envy my neighbors car, and therefore I hate my neighbor even more so.

He has a Aston Martin, Vanquish Volante -- he just bought it yesterday.

I know he watches what I buy, and he timed it to be right after I brought home my new McLaren 12C.

At 5.30 AM today, after some deliberation, I decided to take a dump on the windshield of the Aston Martin.

Outside it was cold, and foggy.

I got gingerly up onto the hood, and dropped my pants -- and while I was not worried about getting caught, my neighbor came out on the driveway.

"Hi." I heard my voice say calmly.

"Ok." was all he said.

He jumped onto the hood of my McLaren and copied me.

We shit at the same time.

We didn't say anything else as we both closed the front doors to our houses -- each with a near-identical view of a misty pre-dawn ocean.


*

After thinking about it -- I know one thing for certain: We all act like we know what is going to happen next, we act like we certainly know what the possibilities are.

But we have no idea what will happen next, whatsoever.

For all of it.


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Southern California
Winter 2014

Writing - Rain

It rained a lot, all year round, and he drank to the rain. He'd be drunk, and it would be raining -- he'd sleep and hear the rain falling. The rain fell through things, through moonlight, sunlight, through holes in the eves. Dripping eves made him angry. A drainpipe was clogged with leaves, and the rainwater turned black at the foot of the sinking foundations of the two-story building he rented the apartment at. When it rained especially hard, the wall of the abandoned house next to the apartment would turn the color of tanned skin. Then he'd unsteadily turn on a light that should have shed an amber happy glow to offset this. The light was amber, it cheered him a bit, but then he forgot what he felt and the dreaming would start again. Two closets with curtains instead of doors leered at him, full of old papers and old boxes.


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Oak Park
Lombard Street
2009

Writing - The Model from Brazil

Then there was the winter evening in the gallery in Laguna Beach, when the drunken Brazilian supermodel came in to look at the art.

"Are you gay?" she asked him, standing very close, looking at him.

"No, I am not." he replied.

"Oh. My friend is gay. He drives me everywhere." she said, swaying slightly, as if under water.

"Your friend seems to be a very good friend to you, to help you get around."

"Yes." she said. "Would you like to kiss me?"

"What do you mean by that?" he asked.

"Would you like to kiss me?" the model said.

"Of course I would." he replied, and he held her and kissed gently on her cheek, next to her ear for a long time, swaying to a phantom tide.

She left with a few of his books and he never saw her again.



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Winter 2013
Laguna Beach, CA