Poem - getting ever higher and brighter and happier and faster and higher

i had everything and then my life started being destroyed by my success
but because it looked so good from the outside no one felt anything
as i began to crack my co-workers feigned indifference
and my opponents celebrated with a party

so i celebrated as well to outdo them
insane through laughing and the debts and highs
getting ever higher and brighter and happier and faster and higher
and we all were laughing and partying and excelling and being the 1%

i blacked out
i woke up in a graveyard

i broke the fixtures
in a hotel in las vegas

i drove a bently
into a river

my ca house
burned down

attorneys
pr

2 boxes

nothing

home-
less

not understanding what i am seeing over the top of a wall
it could be palm trees but i don't know in what town
i am this and i don't know where i am
i have this coat and paper

they stole from me down there
took a book and a switchblade and note pad and pens
besides the oil stained creator by the dumpster on the corner
i have always been here i will always be here hello they stole from me


*

Hollywood
2015