Chung Tzu & I vs The Librarian

I see Chung Tzu in the "quiet reading" section of the Oak Park Library.
"Hello, Chopped Stick!" he says.
"Hello, Dirty Old Man!" I reply.
"Shhhhhhhhhhh!" says the Librarian.

We wait until the Librarian is gone.
"So what's news?" asks Chung Tzu.
"It's raining. There's water in my garage. I can't stop the water from getting in." I reply.
"There's garage in your water." says Chung Tzu, thinking this statement is very funny.

I look to see if the Librarian can hear us.
"I can't get everything done, at my house. There's too much to do." I say.
"There's a dirty sock on your stairs." admits Chung Tzu.
We wait a bit, as the Librarian walks by.

"Hey, Dumbass!" says Chung Tzu, this time loudly.
"Hey, what, Shitwit!" says I, as the Librarian calls Security.
"I wouldn't want to be a Librarian in a world with us in it." says Chung Tzu, standing up.
"I know what you mean." I say, as we get going.