Aren't You Going to Thank Me for That?!?

Yes, yes, I drank your precious bottle of genuine India Ink. There, are you happy? No deceptions, I did drink it. If it makes you feel any better, afterwards I was immediately sick for 25 hours. I was horribly and absolutely ill, like I was going to die. Don't you feel bad about that? Wine? What wine? OK, I'm really going to come clean with you -- I drank your wine. How much? I don't know, how many bottles did you have laying around? That many? I don't know if I could have physically drank all of that. I had a few glasses. More than a few, don't get so touchy. Look, calm down, don't be so goddamn touchy. It cost how much? Lordy, I didn't even know you could buy French wine at that price. I won't say I'm sorry because I can see that will only make you more angry, and do you see how that makes me feel? Hurt. Speaking of hurt, I may have hurt your car. Where is it? That is a Question for the Ages. I was in a hazy state of mind and the road was definitely not the safest place to drive, in my confused state of mind. It may be under a large tree. Scattered under a large tree. OK -- I parked it in a large tree, and parts of it are scattered under the tree branches. But I have the keys, and it is locked, so nobody is going to steal it. Aren't you going to thank me for that?!?